3 Ways to Build A Confident Child With Your Choice of Words!

Isn’t it fast how we are nearing the end of the first term of the academic year? With the examinations looming, I think a lot of children (especially those in their transition years) are feeling apprehensive.

 

3 Ways to Build A Confident Child With Your Choice of Words!

And it is completely normal to feel this way. After all, fear is a common response to new challenges or experiences. Children and even adults feel it. When we are thrown a curveball, we often feel uncertain, vulnerable, powerless and anxious. We resist it because this unfamiliar situation strips away our sense of security and control. It is no wonder that one will often choose the path of less resistance- to avoid the unfamiliar. However, this will lead to many missed opportunities. Who knows? You could be really good at something but probably won’t ever know it unless you try. And sometimes, one try isn’t all it takes. It might take more. That’s where grit comes in. However, to be bold enough to take the first step and try (even when knowing you might not succeed immediately), one will need the can-do attitude. Where does this arise from? Confidence.

Research has shown that confident children are better equipped to deal with pressure and responsibility,  as well as more eager to rise to challenges. As parents and teachers, we are key players in helping a child to gain confidence. Today, I will share with you how to build a confident child with your choice of words.

 

A lil' confidence

 

1. “I know you have tried your best, and I am immensely proud of that effort!”

It is common to praise a child freely when he or she has performed. However, what about the times when the child has performed less than ideal? Instead of holding back our praises, we should applaud their courage or effort to try anyway. Focus on the journey, and not the destination.

Over at Lil’ but Mighty, we are a firm believer of each individual’s growth. We all start somewhere and no improvement is too big or too small to celebrate. Your positive words of affirmation show the child that you recognise his/ her effort to grow and learn. This will spur him/ her on to try again/ harder. In the long run, the desire to want to try hard will help them build more confidence and growth than just simply doing well.

2. “You did more than just a good job, you….”

We often forget that children are sharper than we think. When positive feedback becomes consistent (telling them “Good job!” all the time), there is a chance that it will lose its effect on them and they may start to ignore the compliments. In fact, some call this “empty praise”.

Show that you are invested in their learning and the journey by providing specific feedback. You can do this by choosing to speak in ways that focus on observation, acknowledgement, appreciation and encouragement. Instead of saying “Good job!” you might want to point out areas which your child has done well and share your pride. For example:

“It was nice that you tried to include some of the new words you’ve learnt into your composition this time!”  “You figured….. out!”  “I appreciate that you….”

3. “Sometimes we make mistakes, but that is how we learn”

Instead of focusing on the mistake, encourage your child to learn from it. Show him or her that mistakes and failures are not to be feared and they merely open another door for learning. Sit down with your child and go through the errors together. For example, when your child gets their exam papers back, highlight what could be learnt from the errors that she or he has made and tell your child that it is precisely through making such errors now that she or he will gain awareness to avoid it the next time. If it is a knowledge error, tell them that it is good to recognise it now and reassure him or her that there will be time to plug in these gaps before the next exam! Adopt the “next time you can….” approach to help him or her see that he or she can try again and that you are willing to work with him or her to explore ways to learn from the mistakes.

Having said that, as with all things, it is the balance that counts. Excessive and constant praise can lead to a child being over complacent and not able to recognise when he or she needs to work on an area. Short of allowing the praises and glorification of mistakes to be an excuse for children, we should learn to draw the line when necessary.

In conclusion, the right kind of praise and words at the right time, given in the right quantity can help a child but excessive praise may actually be counterproductive.

To be honest, developing confidence does not happen overnight. It takes time and even I struggle with it from time to time. Therefore, the consistent support you provide your child will help him or her to avoid shying away from challenges and in turn, help him or her to become his or her more resilient self!

How do you build confidence in your child? Share in the comments below!

 

Ms. Siow

Ms Siow is a dedicated teacher who is committed to providing an environment where a child can grow and thrive. She enjoys developing strategies to help students learn in a fun and meaningful way. Through her lessons, she hopes to help students lay a sound foundation in grammar and gain independence in their work. She strongly believes that good grammar is essential in students to gain proficiency in the language and finds joy in watching the bricks of their strong grammar foundation take form.

Have something to share? Drop us a comment below!

Leave a Reply

Share

Other related posts

Creative Writing | 3 Easy Steps to Write Your Own Haiku!
Verbs: More than Just Action Words! | Part 3: Changes in Verb Forms
Ketchup on English! – is, are, was and were!
Audience In Visual Text | Visual Text Comprehension
Exploring Points of View (POV) in Composition Writing
Metaphors For? | Part II – Implied Metaphors
10 Beautiful Vivid Verbs to Boost Your Writing and Oral! | Primary School English
Metaphors For? | Part I – An Introduction to Metaphors
3 Family-Friendly Shows on Netflix (Educational & Entertaining)!
Verbs: More than Just Action Words! | Part 2: Tenses
2021 Father’s Day Contest Winners
Verbs: More than Just Action Words! | Part 1: Subject-Verb Agreement
10 Beautiful Words You Can Use in Narrative / Descriptive Writing | Secondary School
Ways To Create A Well-Rounded Character | Creative Writing
Understanding Purpose-Related Questions in Visual Text Comprehension
How Playing Video Games Can Improve Our English (With Practical Tips for Parents!)
Primary School Composition | Onomatopoeia – What’s That?
2021 Mother’s Day Contest Winners + Our Founder’s Journey (Mother’s Day Special)!
Composition Revision: Using Your 5 Senses in Your Writing
How to Create A Dynamic Piece of Writing Using Idioms
Ketchup on English! – Subject-Verb Agreement
Punctuation Marks: Colon Vs. Semicolon
4 steps to Create Suspense
That Simile Though 2 | Using Stronger Similes
Practice or Practise? What’s the Difference?!
PSLE ORAL | Compiled Prelim 2021 Oral Topics + Questions!
If you’re looking at getting recent PSLE Prelim Oral topics and practice questions, this will be an excellent resource for you!
5 Steps to Convert a Newspaper Article into a Cloze Passage
I would like to share with you 5 steps on how authentic articles can be transformed into cloze passages easily. Read on here!
PSLE English | Oral Conversation: Free SG50 Sample Practice + Model Answers
In this blogpost we will be touching on the oral stimulus-based conversation topic of National Day and SG50! Read on here!
PSLE English | Oral Conversation: Filling your Story with Details Easily + Free Revision Cards
By simply using the 5W1H, your children will be able to lengthen their stories (hence, the conversation!). Read on here!
PSLE English | Situational Writing: Q&A + Formal vs Informal Writing Comparison Chart
To aid you in your situational writing revision, here is a comparison chart that shows the differences between formal and informal writing!
PSLE English Tips | Oral: Stimulus-Based Conversation Checklist
To help my children handle the Stimulus-Based Conversation examination, here are some instructions again about using the checklist!
A Little Encouragement | DIY Motivational Bookmark (Easy to personalise too!)
A bookmark with a quote to motivate is also a chance for them to see the power of words and how words can mean more than what they seem.
Situational Writing: Step-by-Step Guide + Free Revision Card
I believe a walkthrough on the process of doing situational writing is in order. Here are the requirements for content and language!
I Love Reading | 5 Ways to Motivate Reluctant Readers
One of the most important ingredients necessary for a child or anyone learning English is the habit of reading. Get motivated to read now!
PSLE English | Printable Ultimate Grammar & Synthesis Summary
Today, we are sharing two lists of essentials in our Ultimate Grammar and Synthesis Summary Printable. Download them free here!
How Well Do You Know Your Past Participles?
While we are familiar with the past, present and future tenses, the little less known but equally important tense is the past participles.
Primary Composition Writing | Starting Sentences with Introductory Clauses
Today, we'll be revising the use of sentence starters to help you create variety in your sentence structures. Read on here!
The Sentence Train | Lower Primary English
Today, we are going to learn what makes up a sentence. It will come in handy when you do the word order activity in school! Read on here!
PSLE English Tips | Oral: Reading Checklist
This Oral Reading Checklist can be used by children when they practise reading on their own. Download it now!
Language of COVID | 10 Words Added to the Dictionary
Using Personification to Show, Not Tell!
Expressing Character Feelings Too! | Using Show-Not-Tell (Part 2)
How to Choose a Book to Read: 8 Ways
How to Dress Up A Boring Paragraph | Creative Writing
Ketchup on English! – Halloween Special: Prepositions of Time!
Ketchup on English! – Verbs Are Not Just Action Words!
Expressing Character Feelings | Using Show-Not-Tell
Which Picture Should I Use? | Choosing the Best Picture to Use for Composition!
Oral: Reading Passage | Long Vowels – Have You Been Reading Your Vowels Correctly?
Previous
Next

Like what you are reading?

Subscribe now to receive news and tips hot off the press!

Primary School English Tuition| Lil' but Mighty English